7 Doors of Death (1981)

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7 Doors to Death
And You Will Live in Terror: The Afterlife
And You Will Live in Terror: The Beyond
The Beyond
Don't Torture a Zombie
Seven Doors of Death

Tagline(s):	Through the Gates of Hell they came...from The Beyond
	The Living Dead Have Taken Possession
	The flesh-craving undead return to the land of the living and raise a little hell of their own...
	Beyond Death... Beyond Evil... Beyond the Dreaded Gates of Hell
	Don't go in unless you're ready to die!
	Behind this doorway lie the terrifying and unspeakable secrets of hell. No one who sees it lives to describe it. And you shall live in darkness for all eternity.
	The seven dreaded gateways to hell are concealed in seven cursed places... And from the day the gates of hell are opened, the dead will walk the earth.
	Unlock Your Deepest Fears
	You can't escape...
	YOU Will Live in Terror!
	...Behind This [sic.] Door Lie the Terrifying and Unspeakable Secrets of Hell!
	Beyond Death... Beyond Evil... THROUGH THE GATES OF HELL THEY CAME ...FROM The Beyond
	Only Death Awaits in The Beyond

Nomination Year: 1995

SYNOPSIS: A woman inherits a run-down hotel in a sleepy Louisiana town (as seen through the eyes of an Italian). She little suspects that it lies atop a portal to Hell. Or maybe seven portals. It's not clear at all. Townsfolk begin dying by strange and violent means. The dead rise to plague the living. Eventually, even she and her new paramour succumb to the unfathomable (i.e., "impossible to understand") evil that has been unleashed.

Bryan Cassidy

Smithee Award Nominations

Worst Special Effect
The Amazing Trained Tarantula Kickline The librarian dies when he falls from a ladder. A line of tarantulas advance on his body. Most look suspiciously mechanical. And wow! They all move in sync! Kudos to the spider-wrangler.

"Alas, Poor Yorick"
A Splitting Headache The hero finds only one other person alive--a morgue attendant. He dies seconds later when the window explodes for no good reason and a shard embeds itself in his forehead.

Worst Cover Copy

7 Drawings of Cheesiness

The cover is cheesy, with mainly drawings instead of photos.

NOTE: Back in 1995 when we presented this at Smithees III, we did not have the means to digitize the cover. None of the ones I've seen on today's internet quite seem to match the original, though the drawing one with The Beyond comes close. Since the original was rented from a store and I don't own a copy, it may be lost to time.

Crummiest Ending
"How Should I End This? Aw, Heck, the Good Guys Just Lose." The ending sucks! They find themselves in the Underworld (which is somehow in the basement of the hotel). They walk forward. Their eyes go white. The good guys get taken over and lose. THE END.

Directors

Director	Claim to Fame
Lucio Fulci	Abandoned medicine for a career in film...and what a career. Rose to become the Italian King of Giallo film, Master of the Macabre. Often inserted himself in his films as cameo bit parts (or, in the case of Cat in the Brain, as the lead). And his death was as mysterious as his life.

Cast

Actor	Character	Claim to Fame
Catriona MacColl	Liza Merril	Injured ballerina turned Italian scream queen and B-movie/TV actress.
David Warbeck	Dr. John McCabe	Did two TV versions of Treasure Island...one in space.
Cinzia Monreale	Emily	AKA Sarah Keller. Played Bionda in Everybloody's End.
Antoine Saint-John	Schweick	Was in such blockbusters as 7 Doors of Death, The Killer Must Kill Again, and Duck, You Sucker.
Veronica Lazar	Martha	Was Rosa in Last Tango in Paris.
Giovanni De Nava	Joe the Plumber	Dr. Freudstein in The House by the Cemetary.
Al Cliver	Dr. Harris	Egyptian actor which lots of little Bad Movie bit parts to his name.
Lucio Fulci	Town Clerk (uncredited)	Abandoned medicine to rise to become the Italian Master of the Macabre, King of Giallo. Often put himself in his films as cameos.


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