Red-Blooded American Girl (1990)
Red Blooded American Girl

Nomination Year: 1992
SYNOPSIS:  At her boyfriend's workplace, beautiful Paula (Heather Thomas) accidentally gets injected with an experimental serum which turns its victims into bloodthirsty vampires. Owen, the boyfriend, has to risk his own life to cure her with a hazardous transfusion, which he does. And oh, by the way: she's been through a hideously difficult physical and medical condition; so has he. What do they do? Make love on the operating tables, during the transfusion, of course. But hey, it's Heather Thomas, after all.

Best One-Liner

A Really Bad Mood
Paula is about to go out on the town to prowl for blood and her boyfriend tries to stop her. He says he'll get help, he'll call the cops.

Paula: "What are going to tell them?" (Adopting a valley-girl attitude) "'I, like, work with these vampires, and they infected this chick, and now she's in a really bad mood!'"

Worst Cover Copy

Hot Tip: Watch the Film Before You Write the Cover Copy
On the front cover is a naked woman wrapped in an American flag, blood trickling from her mouth. The woman is not even Heather Thomas. "An Exotic Thriller" is the subtitle (emphasis theirs). On the back, under a picture of Heather, it reads, "Science created the perfect woman -- with only one flaw. She had everything to live for -- but no way to die." First off, science didn't create her. The only thing "Science" did was to create the serum that turns ordinary schmucks into second-rate vampires. Secondly, these "vampires" aren't immortal or immune to injury; they're just normal people (perhaps a bit stronger) who maniacally crave blood. They can be killed like anyone else. Thirdly, she -- unlike the audience about halfway through -- didn't want to die, as it implies.

Actors/Directors of Note
Actor Claim to Fame
Heather Thomas Gorgeous gal on The Fall Guy 
Christopher Plummer Famous actor who doesn't seem to read the script before he accepts a job 
Andrew Stevens also credited as "Hugh Janus" ... at what point did that seem like a good idea? 
Kim Coates  
Director Claim to Fame
David Blyth  

Bryan Cassidy

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© 2011-2014 Bryan D. Cassidy, Greg Pearson, Matthew Quirk, and Kevin Hogan. All Rights Reserved.