Nomination Year: 1999

SYNOPSIS: Another half-Oriental / half-Caucasian ninja picture. The Oriental half involves a guy named Jaguar-One, who is cooler than you are. There's also drug trafficking, kidnapping, and martial arts. The Caucasian half involves something ridiculous called the Ninja(r) Empire, and a golden statue of the Ultimate Ninja(r). The statue is in three pieces, and has been stolen by our hero (Richard Harrison) and his buddies, who have realized that the Ninja(r) Empire is corrupt. The Ninja(r) empire seeks the statue's return, and that's the "plot" of the film.

Smithee Award Nominations

Most Ludicrous Premise
Because the "Tickle Me Elmo" Method Just Wasn't Garnering the Proper Respect The Ninja(r) Empire communicates its displeasure with Richard Harrison by sending him a recording that plays from a little Go-bot-like toy (with sparkler)! It interrupts his phone call (on a Garfield phone, no less). Garfield the Cat -- telephone of the Ninja(r) Empire!	Sorry, this clip has not yet been made available!

Inane Dialogue
The Police Should Hear of This The bad-acting brother of the deceased says, "The police say he was found with pieces of metal in his back. That means someone wanted to kill him."	Sorry, this clip has not yet been made available!

"WHAT?!"
They're Sensitive about Their Lack of Eateries Now, I know that in chop-sockey films, fights start for very little reason, but come on! "I'm looking for a restaurant." "Oh, yeah? Well, there aren't any restaurants around here!" *whack* *pow*	Sorry, this clip has not yet been made available!

Crummiest Ending
The Ultimate Ninja™! Now in Gold! The horrific ending fight scene: three (count 'em! three) different ninjas fighting over the pieces of a butt-ugly golden statue. Camouflage ninja (Richard Harrison in heavy makeup) wins, puts the statue back together and his sole surviving opponent commits suicide by making himself explode (I think). The End.	Sorry, this clip has not yet been made available!

Directors

Director	Claim to Fame
Godfrey Ho	Possibly directed more Smithee films than anyone else - also known as: Alton Cheung, Tommy Cheung, Ho Chi-Keung, Elton Chong, Daniel Clough, Leong Fui Fong, Antonin Gasner, Martin Greenfield, Godfrey Hall, Zhi Jiang He, Benny Ho, Chi-Mou Ho, Chun-Sing Ho, Fong Ho, York Lam, Bruce Lambert, Charles Lee, Frank Lewis, Joe Livingstone, Jerry Sawyer, Victor Sears, Robert Young, Albert Yu.

Cast

Actor	Character	Claim to Fame
Richard Harrison	<Not Yet in Database>	best Caucasian Ninja ever!
Jang Lee Hwang	Tiger	Known as the ultimate superkicker, he was former taekwondo instructor to the Korean Army. Was in The Invincible Armour, The Drunken Master, Snake in the Eagle's Shadow, and many more kung-fu films.
Shô Kosugi	<Not Yet in Database>	One of the most famous martial artists on film; Hosts his own "Ninja Theater" series of movies.
Wong Cheng Il	<Not Yet in Database>
Jonathan Wattis	<Not Yet in Database>
Sing Chen	<Not Yet in Database>
Paulo Tocha	<Not Yet in Database>
Phillip Ko	<Not Yet in Database>	Hong Kong actor in MANY chop-sockey films.
Simon Kim	<Not Yet in Database>	half (along with brother James) of the "Tiger Twins"

© 1992-2025 Bryan D. Cassidy and Greg Pearson. All Rights Reserved.