Amityville Dollhouse (1996)
Amityville Dollhouse: Evil Never Dies
Nomination Year: 2005
SYNOPSIS: Boy, you'd think that with a title like that it would be really cheesy and really exciting. Well, it wasn't. True, the premise is horrible, but the dollhouse doesn't do much more than light up as weird things happen. I guess we couldn't have asked for much more. In any case, this widower architect with a teenage boy and a younger girl remarries this hot woman with a creepy, nerdy boy of her own. The Brady Bunch they're not, because everyone seems to hate everyone else. But he's built them a nice house on the site of where another nice house burnt down, leaving only the eerie shed out back. In that shed, they find a beautiful dollhouse. Dad cleans it up and gives it to his daughter (since her real present got mysteriously run over--in the garage--by the parked car). Strange, deadly supernatural hijinx ensue, including several racy scenes where we're supposed to believe that the Evil is making the stepmom hot for her new stepson. In the end, the family finds the source of the evil and attempts to destroy the dollhouse, only to end up destroying the REAL house as well (since whatever happened in one, happened in the other, you see). All in all, disappointing.
- "Let's Up The Rating To 'R'"
Creepy =/= Sexy
Let's get drunk and have sex in the creepy haunted shed among the dead bug collection, baby! And it reeks, too! Bonus!
- Stupidest-Looking Monster
In the Netherworld of the Evil Dollhouse
Some really Inane Dialogue and some Even Stupider-Looking Monsters.
- Acting Appropriately Stupid
Did I Kill It?
The Evil Wasp has come to life and is flying around. The son's going to smash it -- but he uses the hollow box, then he LIFTS it to see. Of course, he gets clobbered. You just can't teach these kids today -- everything's in one ear and out the other.
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