The New Barbarians (1982)
[+]
(Foreign Titles)
Nomination Year: 2013
SYNOPSIS: The Post-Apocalyptic Disco Butt-sex Movie.
So. In this world of Post Apocalypso, there is a group of Templars who have decided that they need to cleanse the world of the sin that is humanity. Starting, naturally, with everybody else. This they do with a couple caravans until our lone rider hero Scorpion (Giancarlo Prete) shows up and rescues a non-horrifically-mauled (and hot!) caravan straggler (Anna Kanakis). The two of them, along with sometimes-lone companion Nadir (Fred Williamson), make it to a heavily fortified encampment and hole up for a while.
As is the usual progression of these things, the Templars are not happy about this turn of events, and decide to waste a lot of resources trying to capture the encampment. There is also some history between the head Templar and Scorpion which only exacerbates the Templars' killing fervor. Naturally, the only solution is for Scorpion to take on the whole holy gang by himself, which doesn't go well for him the first go around. With a bit of rescuing by Nadir(**), a new pair of pants (Templars have an interesting torture regimen) and an awesome(*) new plexiglass suit of indestructibility, Scorpion is ready to kick Templar ass ... even if he's still walking a bit funny.
(*)Awesome meaning utterly ridiculous in this instance.
(**)Speaking of Nadir, Williamson's character seems to primarily show up when Scorpion is getting a beat-down, and then waits to step in until he's sure Scorpion is absolutely screwed. This happened often enough that we nicknamed Nadir "Clippy" for his "Hey! It looks like you're getting your ass kicked. Would you like some help with that?" entrances.
So. In this world of Post Apocalypso, there is a group of Templars who have decided that they need to cleanse the world of the sin that is humanity. Starting, naturally, with everybody else. This they do with a couple caravans until our lone rider hero Scorpion (Giancarlo Prete) shows up and rescues a non-horrifically-mauled (and hot!) caravan straggler (Anna Kanakis). The two of them, along with sometimes-lone companion Nadir (Fred Williamson), make it to a heavily fortified encampment and hole up for a while.
As is the usual progression of these things, the Templars are not happy about this turn of events, and decide to waste a lot of resources trying to capture the encampment. There is also some history between the head Templar and Scorpion which only exacerbates the Templars' killing fervor. Naturally, the only solution is for Scorpion to take on the whole holy gang by himself, which doesn't go well for him the first go around. With a bit of rescuing by Nadir(**), a new pair of pants (Templars have an interesting torture regimen) and an awesome(*) new plexiglass suit of indestructibility, Scorpion is ready to kick Templar ass ... even if he's still walking a bit funny.
(*)Awesome meaning utterly ridiculous in this instance.
(**)Speaking of Nadir, Williamson's character seems to primarily show up when Scorpion is getting a beat-down, and then waits to step in until he's sure Scorpion is absolutely screwed. This happened often enough that we nicknamed Nadir "Clippy" for his "Hey! It looks like you're getting your ass kicked. Would you like some help with that?" entrances.
Jeannette Quirk